Music.

One thing that I absolutely cannot live without is music. If I didn't have any music in my life, I'd die. No joke. Music for me (and probably a lot of other people) is like therapy. There's music for every occasion. Happy, sad, dance-y, calm, etc. Lately I've been easily upset so my music choice has been slow/sad songs.

My original intention of this post was to explain how music can really help when you're not in a good mood. I personally listen to most all genres of music. When I'm angry I usually listen to death metal/screamo stuff. When I'm happy, you can always see me jamming to anything upbeat. My point is that music is a good way of expressing emotions. Sometimes when I'm sad, I'll listen to sad music and it'll just make me feel better because I'll feel like someone can relate to me. Music is my solace. I can't imagine life without music. That's like a zebra without stripes. I guess that's all I really have to say. I also compiled a list of artists/songs that you all can check out. The italicized ones are my personal favorites.

• Asking Alexandria
• White Tie Affair
• Lemonade Mouth
• Skyscraper - Demi Lovato
• Amazing Because It Is - The Almost
• Adele
• Bring Me the Horizon
• Justin Bieber
• 3OH!3
• OneRepublic
• Pierce the Veil
• The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
• Breakeven - The Script
• Taylor Swift
• Victoria Justice
• Kelly Clarkson
• Yellowcard
• Moves Like Jagger - Maroon 5
• Stereo Hearts - Gym Class Heroes ft. Adam Levine
• The All-American Rejects

There's many more that I could name, but I just don't have the time right now. Enjoy!! (:

Why I Haven't Posted In Ages.

The reasons I haven't posted:
Lately, I've been completely stressed out, until this past Monday that is. The main causes of my stress were marching band and school. Those last three weeks of band were the hardest I've ever worked in my life. You see, the first week was state finals week and the other two were BOA. For those of you that don't know what BOA is, it's the biggest band competition in the history of the universe. BOA stands for bands of America. Grand Nationals are held in Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis every year. Back to what I was essentially saying though, I was so stressed out those three weeks because of how many hours I put into band and school every day each week. Plus maintaining my good grades on top of that. It was not easy, let me tell you. I'm a junior in high school and this was my third year in marching band. Junior year + BOA Grand Nats week = Stressful x100. Now that marching season is over though, I'm gonna have a lot more time to post things.

Another reason why I haven't posted is because I had no idea what to talk about. I have a couple ideas now, but I'm still building on them, so they won't be posted for a while.

A few updates on past posts:
My friend that I was ranting about in the last post and I are back to the way we used to be. She realized that she'd actually have to initiate fixing something and that I wasn't just going to let myself be used by her. So she learned and I got my friend back, yay!

Like I said I would, I got over the whole lying to my mom thing. Which is probably bad, but in my defense she doesn't let me go out often.

As for the person I was talking about in my post about change, we are no longer friends. We aren't even acquaintances. He changed into a completely different person. But I'm okay because I don't even know who he is now, and I don't care to know the person that he has turned into.

Posts that are coming soon:
Music
Social Networking Sites
School
Relationships
& many more.

Let me just throw out some other irrelevant things while I'm here.


Things I'm excited for:
Winter break.
Christmas.
Going to Pasadena for TOR with the band!

• You should check out Kingsley on Youtube. I personally think that he's hilarious. Beware though, he's got quite a sailor's mouth.

Alright, I think that's about it for today. I'll get back to posting my usual things soon! Adios for now & thanks for reading! :)

Friendship.

Friendship is a key component to life. Without friendship, we have no communication with others outside our family. Friends are there when sometimes family is not. Some friends can even be so close whereas they are like family. I have a lot of friends, some that are like family and others that are more like acquaintances than friends.

Lately my one friend and I have been fighting a lot. She always makes me out to be the bad guy. Every. Single. Time. I don't want to lose her as a friend, but I don't know if I can deal with this constant fighting. Sometimes being friends with her is like being in a relationship, and I'm the guy. Apparently even when I'm trying my hardest to help, I can't do anything right and she gets mad without seeing my point of view.

I'm quite aware that this friendship isn't good for me emotionally because of the constant tiptoeing around her feelings. But she's like a sister to me and I don't know if I can let it go.  I don't really know what to do. I want to be friends with her still, but I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to keep up with her being so emotional all the time.

The worst part is that half the time, she bottles up her feeling and doesn't tell me what's wrong. And then sometimes when she's mad at me, she won't tell me why. She posts things on Facebook and Twitter about her feelings, but she won't tell anyone who it's pertaining to. I clearly know it's about me and it bothers me because she doesn't have the decency to tell me herself how she feels. This pisses me off because she won't tell me anything to my face or even over text message, but she can post it online for everyone to see. Sometimes I think she's just being a huge drama queen, and she is. I deal with it because of how close we are, but I'm beginning to wonder if it's worth all the stress it causes me. I like to be surrounded by positive attitudes and hers is constantly shifting from positive to negative within nearly every 5 minutes.

I hope I can figure out what I want to do with this situation. Thanks for reading even though this really only pertains to me and my problem. I just needed to let it out without actually telling someone. I guess that's all for now. Until next time. Adios!

Change.

Some people think that change is a good thing and they embrace it, while other people believe change to be a bad thing and they hate it. I see change as a good and bad thing. Some changes are good while other changes are not. My feelings towards change stay the same when it applies to people. There is nothing wrong with people changing themselves, but what really irks me is when people change themselves and who they are for other people. I've been thinking about this a lot lately.

If someone can't accept you for who you are, why would you still want to be friends with them? You shouldn't have to change for that person or group of people. If they really want to be friends with you, they'll accept you for who you are truly. And if they don't, they weren't your friends in the first place. More and more people nowadays find it necessary to change themselves to change themselves to fit in with other people. Within this process of changing, they lose sight of who they really on are the inside. I comment those that stay true to themselves. Kudos to you guys. And to those of you that feel like you need to change yourselves for another person or other people, think about it. Do you really want to hang out with these people that badly? Are they worth changing yourself? Most importantly, think of your other friends. How is this change going to affect them? I know from personal experience how it feels to start losing a friend of they made themselves different for other people. It hurts a lot. Especially when you realize that you're in love with them. But ya know.

So the next time you meet someone new and they want you to change or you feel like you need to change for them, remember to ask yourself how it's going to effect you and those around you and if it's really worth it. Change isn't bad, just make sure you keep in mind the outcomes of what you're doing. You could end up hurting a lot of people and ultimately end up hurting yourself in the long run.

Change can be good or bad. Just know what you're doing when you decide to change. Pay attention to this because it's really important. Trust me on this when I tell you that you need to realize what you're doing when you make the decision to change.

Thanks for hearing me out on this and hopefully you keep my warning in mind.

Fake People.

I really hate fake people. Is it so hard to be real nowadays? I guess it is. What irritates me to no end though is when people talk about their friends. Is that really necessary? If you're gonna talk about your friend behind their back, it just shows that you can't be trusted. Now, it's understandable somewhat if your told your friend to their face what you were telling other people, but just talking about them behind their back isn't cool.

In my opinion, the thing that makes people talk about other people is insecurity. The person doesn't feel secure about themselves, so they talk about other people to make them feel better about themselves. I understand that you're insecure, but that gives you no right to talk about people behind their backs.

I will straight up tell you that I don't talk about people behind their backs. If I don't like you, I will tell you. Yes, I realize that it makes me seem like a real bitch, but I'm not going to be fake and act like I like you if I don't. Now, don't take that as me telling you to go and start telling everyone how you actually feel about them. If you want to do that, go for it, but beware the consequences and don't say I didn't warn you.

The worst thing though is when the person that you're talking about finds out that you're talking about them. Especially if it's a good friend of yours. Also, don't make it worse by trying to lie to them and tell them that you weren't talking about them. Own up to it. (Wo)Man up. You know how you could avoid that situation? STOP TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE.  Just saying.

Nobody is perfect. I don't claim to be. But all I ask is that people stop being fake and that they stop talking about people behind their backs. And if you can't do that, at least stop talking about your friends behind their back. That's just sketchy. I hope some of what I said stays with you and you become a better person because of it. And even if you don't stop talking about people, I hope you at least feel bad about it. Sorry for guilt tripping you, but I'm just trying to make the world a better place and letting out my thoughts.

Thanks for reading!

Lying.

So, one thing that I have been thinking about lately (and by lately I mean nonstop for the past 2 hours) is lying. Today, I lied to my mom and told her that I had a sectional after band practice. For all you non-band people, that means my section, the flutes, stayed after rehearsal to practice some more. Now that was a bold-faced lie. There was no sectional. I went to Starbucks with a few of my friends. I knew if I told my mom the truth about what I was going to be doing, she wouldn't have let me go, and that would have caused an argument. To keep away from an argument, I lied to her. Now the entire time that I was at Starbucks, I was fine and wasn't thinking much about the lie, but as soon as I got home, that's all I could think about. I started feeling so guilty. I'm currently feeling extremely guilty. I know that the guilt will pass with time and there's no way I'm going to be able to tell my mom the truth because she would flip her lid. The point is that I feel so extremely guilty. I hate lying to my mom because she loves me and trusts me so much. I just had to vent about this and let my feelings about because none of my friends would really understand my guilt about lying. I guess that's all for this post. I'll probably post one again soon. 

Sorry I haven't been able to keep up with the weekly thing so far. My life has been wake up, school, band, homework, sleep. Rinse and repeat. I'll do my best to post stuff as often as I can, and after band ends, I'll work on posting once a week. Thanks for reading, even though this was just listening to me vent. (:

Judging People.

One thing that bothers me to no end is when people judge other people. Now I can't say that I've never judged anyone in my life, so I know that it makes me a hypocrite. The reason I get so hyped up when people judge others is because they don't know what's going on in the life of the other person. You could see a kid at school completely knocked out on his or her desk and just assume that he or she is slacking. Did you ever think that maybe he or she was up all night talking a friend out of suicide or being talked out of suicide themself? If you see an overweight person and immediately think that they don't take care of their body, you could be wrong. For all you know, that person is struggling so hard to lose weight. Or maybe some medical condition makes them unable to lose weight.

The thing I hate the most when it comes to judging is when people do it in groups. That's something I consider to be bullying even if the person that they're talking about doesn't know it. As a group, they can tear one person to absolute pieces.

No one really stops to think what's going on in other people's lives except their own and the lives of their loved ones. You don't know what a a person is going through. You don't know what in their life made them the way they are. You don't know how their life is like. The world would be such a better place if everyone would try to think about other people more than themselves. But that's not going to happen because it's just human nature to be self-centered.

That's my post for the week. Stay tuned for more. I'll try to post as often as I can.

First Post, Obviously.

Hi. I'm just your average 16 year old girl, but I have a lot to say. I spend a lot of my free time just thinking about things that are going on not only in my life, but in society and in the world. The main reason that I haven't shared my thoughts before is because I don't like upsetting people, but you can't always please everyone. I'm going to try to post something once a week until I have nothing left to say. So essentially, this blog is going to have a lot of posts because like I mentioned in my first sentence, I have a lot to say. I suppose that's all I have for an introduction to what this blog is going to be about. I hope that you come back and check if I've posted anything because hopefully you like what I talk about or you at least see things from my perspective. Thanks in advance!